I feel as though I live in a world that spins around on fake realism. It demands that we be confident and comfortable in our skins now, now, now.
It feels like I am being forced to carry a burden and I can’t bear it anymore.
Imagine a world where we were comfortable in our insecurities. Yes, I am not always confident when it comes to my social interaction and social standing with others, and it’s okay. Yet it almost seems to be demanded of me that I always present this persona of confidence. After all, I am involved in student organizations. I am out spoken in class. I have connections with professors, with staff, with so many different people.
It’s like I can’t have a different, more complex side of me. The side that’s confused, that’s gentle, that’s at once brittle and compassionate. I must be one, I cannot flow into the other.
I want to be comfortable in my own insecurities so I can work through them (vs wallow in them to make myself stale).